The Moreton Pinkney Picayune

Greg's Occasional News & Views

19 November 2017

We’re back! Again. And this time, it really is “we” as Penelope has finally returned home after 43 days away and 30,596 miles or almost 49,000 km! Whew!

On the other hand – I’m off! Again. I fly out this morning to spend Thanksgiving with my mother in New England. After this trip, though, I hope we will be home for a while. Continue reading

19 November 2017 – Amusements

A man was very sick. Doctors feared the worst. He is at home one day, resting in his bed. He looks up and says, “Is my wife here?”

His wife replies, “Yes, dear, I’m here, next to you.”

The man goes, “Are my children here?”

“Yes, Daddy, we are all here,” say the children.

“Are my other relatives also here?”

And they say, “Yes, we are all here…”

The man sits up and says, “Then why in the world is the light on in the kitchen?” Continue reading

29 October 2017

Tuesday 10 October

Our last day at the Outside Inn. Unfortunately, we all had grumbling tummies to some extent or another and so it was a day of restraint. We were to fly to Sanya on Hainan Island that night leaving from Guilin Airport at 22.20 so we had the whole day to relax and leisurely attend to the sorting and packing after 12 days at the Outside Inn. Ronald and his staff were wonderful throughout our visit; as always they were ever helpful and kind. They’ve become like family during our two visits. Continue reading

29 October 2017 – Amusements

Two friends meet in the street. The one man looked rather forlorn and down in the mouth. The other man asked, “Hey, how come you look like the whole world caved in?”

The sad fellow said, “Let me tell you. Three weeks ago, an uncle died and left me ten thousand dollars.”

“I’m sorry to hear about the death, but a bit of good luck for you, eh?”

“Hold on, I’m just getting started. Two weeks ago, a cousin I never knew kicked the bucket and left me twenty thousand, free and clear.”

“Well, you can’t be disappointed with that!”

“Yep. But, last week my grandfather passed away. I inherited almost one hundred thousand dollars.”

“Incredible… so how come you look so glum?”

“Well, this week…nothing!” Continue reading

22 October 2017

Well, we’re back after another great trip to China. I say, “we’re back,” but that’s not really the case. I am back for a couple of weeks while Pen continues her adventures visiting her brother and sister and an aunt while travelling with her sister J in Australia. I’m here for another week and then it all kicks off again. No rest for the wicked. Continue reading

22 October 2017 – Amusements

A Tennessee hill-billy farmer from back in the hills walked twelve miles, one way, to the general store.

“Heya, Wilbur,” said Sam, the store owner. “tell me, are you and Myrtle still making fires up there by rubbing stones and flint together?”

“You betcha, Sam. Ain’t no ‘tother way. Why?”

“Got something to show you. Something to make fire. It’s called a ‘match’.”

“‘Match’? Never heard of it.”

“Watch this. If you want a fire you just do this,” Sam says, taking a match and striking it on his pants.

“Huh. Well, that’s something, but that ain’t for me, Sam.”

“Well, why not?”

“I can’t be walking twelve miles every time I want a fire just to borrow your pants.” Continue reading

24 September 2017

Welcome to what will likely be the last edition of the Moreton Pinkney Picayune for the immediate future – Ms Playchute and I are off to China on Thursday to visit Adam, Ava and the charmingly delightful and gorgeous Jessica for a few weeks so communications could be limited. Limited only because we have too much fun when we visit China and don’t seem to find the time to do much of anything else. There will be a full report upon my return. You may have to wait somewhat longer to enjoy Ms Playchute’s account – after China she is flying off to Australia to spend some time with her sister J visiting some of their Australian relatives. She won’t be back until mid-November! Don’t fret; I am sure she will fill the freezer for me before we go. (Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha). Continue reading

24 September 2017 – Amusements

My husband and I often spell words so that our small children won’t understand what we’re saying. I didn’t realize what a habit this had become until one day when my husband and I were in the grocery store at the soup aisle.

An aggressive young woman banged into our cart, then nudged me over, blocking my access to the soup. Annoyed, I looked at my husband and said, “Boy is she r-u-d-e!”

“Yeah,” he replied, “but I’ll bet she can s-p-e-l-l.” Continue reading

17 September 2017

Wow! Has it turned autumnal all of a sudden. Anyone would think that the summer was over. (What summer, I hear you ask, but to be fair it’s not been a complete washout). The evenings are getting darker earlier, the mornings are “brisk” and the swallows/house martins have vacated the premises, beginning their journey to the warm winter weather. I guess we might get a bit of an Indian summer before we leave for China? Let’s hope so. Continue reading

17 September 2017 – Amusements

Two older, successful businessmen met at a resort. One who had recently retired was describing his life, “I get up late in the morning, have a light breakfast and then I lie down on my veranda for a few hours and relax.

In the afternoon I go inside for lunch, have a great salad, fruits and cold fish, then I spend the rest of the afternoon boating or playing golf or tennis.

When it starts to get dark I have a great dinner with a nice bottle of wine. I smoke a Cuban cigar. Then I go lie on my veranda again.”

The other gentleman acknowledges that this is a life to be envied. Later he reported the conversation to his wife. She asked, “What’s his wife’s name?”

Her husband said, “I’m not sure, but I think it’s Veranda.” Continue reading

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