Greg's Occasional News & Views

1 April 2018 – Amusements

A lady moved from Phoenix to Seattle and when she arrived it was raining. While she moved in, it rained. The next day it rained, and the next, and then the next.

After several rainy days, while standing on her porch, she noticed a young boy on the porch of her neighbor’s house. Trying not to sound too depressed, in a cheerful voice she called over to the lad, “Hi son, I’m your new neighbor.”

“Hi,” the boy called back and waved.

“Say, son, does it ever stop raining here?” she asked.

With a look of consternation, the youngster replied, “Lady, how would I know? I’m only six years old!”


A football coach walked into the locker room before a big game, looked over to his star player and said, “I’m not supposed to let you play since you failed math, but we really need you in there. So, what I have to do is ask you a math question, and if you get it right, you can play.”

The player agreed, so the coach looked into his eyes intently and asked, “Okay, now concentrate hard and tell me the answer to this… What is two plus two?”

The player thought for a moment and then answered, “Four?”

“Did you say four?” the coach exclaimed, excited that he had given the right answer.

Suddenly, all the other players on the team began screaming, “Come on coach, give him another chance!”


Two women, who are dog owners, are arguing whose dog is smarter.

First woman: “My dog is so smart. Every morning he waits for the paperboy to come around and then he takes the newspaper and brings it to me.”

Second woman: “I know.”

First one: “How do you know?”

Second one: “My dog told me.”


 

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