17 January 2021 – Amusements

Things That Are Difficult to Say When You’re Drunk:

Indubitably; Innovative; Preliminary; Proliferation; Cinnamon.

Things That Are VERY Difficult to Say When You’re Drunk:

Specificity; Cogito ergo sum; British; Constitution; Passive-aggressive disorder; Loquacious; Transubstantiate.

Things That Are Downright IMPOSSIBLE to Say When You’re Drunk:

Thanks, but I don’t want to have sex; Nope, no more booze for me; Sorry, but you’re not really my type; Good evening, officer, isn’t it lovely out tonight? Oh, I just couldn’t– no one wants to hear me sing!


My friend Kimberly announced that she had started a diet to lose some pounds she had put on recently.

“Good!” I exclaimed. “I’m ready to start a diet too. We can be dieting buddies and help each other out. When I feel the urge to go out and get a burger and fries, I’ll call you first.”

“Great!” she replied. “I’ll ride with you.”


When I go to casinos, the most ridiculous sign I see is the one that says…”If you have a gambling problem, call 1-800-GAMBLER.” So, I call them and say, “I have an ace and a six. The dealer has a seven. What do I do?”


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