A group of women were at a seminar on how to live in a loving relationship with your husband. The women were asked, “How many of you love your husband?” All the women raised their hands.
Then they were asked, “When was the last time you told your husband you loved him?”
Some women answered today, a few yesterday, and some couldn’t remember.
The women were then told to take out their cell phones and text their husband: “I love you, sweetheart.”
The women were then told to exchange phones with another person, and to read aloud the text message they received, in response.
Here are some of the replies:
1. Who the hell is this?
2. Eh, mother of my children, are you sick or what?
3. Yeah, and I love you too. What’s up with you?
4. What now? Did you wreck the car again?
5. I don’t understand what you mean?
6. What the hell did you do now?
7. You’re kidding, right?
8. Don’t beat about the bush; just tell me how much you need?
9. Am I dreaming?
10. If you don’t tell me who this message is actually for, someone will die.
11. I thought we agreed you wouldn’t drink during the day.
12. Your mother is coming to stay with us, isn’t she?
A guy from Brooklyn was in Hong Kong. While passing through a Jewish neighbourhood he was surprised to see a synagogue. He went in and sure enough, he saw a Chinese Rabbi and a Chinese congregation. The service was touching.
As the service ended, the Rabbi stood at the door greeting his congregants. When our Brooklyn friend came up, the Chinese rabbi said….”You’re a Jew?”
“Yes, I’m Jewish,” replied the Brooklynite.
“Funny,” said the Chinese Rabbi. “You don’t look it.”
In Virginia recently, a computer crash wiped out a decade’s worth of U.S. military data. However, this morning, the Chinese government called and said no problem, we backed it up.