A young bride-to-be went to see her local priest to check on the preparations for her wedding.
“How can I help?” he asked.
“Well, Father”, she began, “it’s to do with my wedding dress. I was wondering what colour it should be.”
“The answer to that depends on your virtues, my dear”, replied the priest.
“What do you mean?” the innocent girl asked.
“It’s simple,” said the priest. “If you are pure and have not sinned, then you wear white.”
“And if…?” asked the girl.
“Otherwise, you wear blue,” explained the priest.
“Oh, I see. Thank you very much.” she said, and turned to go.
“Wait a moment.”, said the priest. “What color will you be wearing?”
“White!” said the girl.
“Oh good,” smiled the priest.
“…with hundreds of little blue polka dots.
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A lawyer phoned the governor’s mansion shortly after midnight. “I need to talk to the governor, it’s an emergency!” exclaimed the lawyer.
After some cajoling, the governor’s assistant agreed to wake him up.
“So, what is it that’s so important that it can’t wait until morning?” grumbled the governor.
“Judge Pierson just died, and I want to take his place,” begged the attorney.
“Well, it’s OK with me if it’s OK with the mortuary,” replied the governor.