The Moreton Pinkney Picayune

Greg's Occasional News & Views

6 November 2016 – Amusements

In the British documentary 56 Up, a man shared that he had earned a law degree at Oxford. Then, in his thick English accent, he proudly proclaimed that he was now a “barrister.”

My 13-year-old daughter wasn’t impressed. “So,” she said, “he spent all that effort getting an Oxford law degree, and now he works at Starbucks?” Continue reading

30 October 2016 – Amusements

I was checking out at the busy super market, and the cashier was having problems. The register ran out of paper, the scanner malfunctioned, and finally the cashier spilled a handful of coins. When she totalled my order, it came to exactly $22.

Trying to soothe her nerves, I said, “That’s a nice round figure.”

Still frazzled, she glared at me and said, “You’re no bean pole yourself.” Continue reading

23 October 2016

Oh, it’s been a busy but fun week. The weather’s been pretty decent although the crispness of Autumn is beginning to give way to the “chilliness” of Autumn. Still, not much gets in between Penelope and her garden. Continue reading

23 October 2016 – Amusements

As we left the gym after our first real workout in years, my husband and I both felt energized. “Let’s make a commitment to do it three times a week,” I said.

“Absolutely,” my husband agreed, “three times at a minimum.”

“And no whining,” I said. “No excuses.”

“No, we’ll do it,” he said enthusiastically, “you can count on it.”

“And on my late night, we can just meet here at the gym.”

“The gym?” my husband said, confused. “I thought we were talking about sex?” Continue reading

16 October 2016

We’ve had some glorious weather this week – exactly what autumn ought to be about. Clear blue skies with a light breeze and a touch of crispness in the air. Cool enough for a sweater or light jacket but no need for the coat yet. The Orchard has begun to display the muted colours which pass for autumn foliage in our part of the UK and work on Penelope’s Garden continues apace. Continue reading

16 October 2016 – Amusements

A man goes to consult a specialist about his medical problem. After the visit the man asks, “How much do I owe you?”

“My fee is five hundred dollars,” replies the physician.

“Five hundred dollars? That’s impossible. No one charges that much!”

“In your case,” the doctor replies, “I suppose I could adjust my fee to three hundred.”

“Three hundred dollars? For one visit? Ridiculous.”

“Well, then, could you afford two hundred?”

“Who has that kind of money?”

“Look, replies the doctor,” growing irritated, “Just give me a hundred and get out of my office, okay?”

“I can give you fifty,” says the man. “Take it or leave it.”

“I don’t understand you,” says the doctor. “Why did you come to the most expensive doctor in New York if you have no money?”

“Listen, Doctor,” says the patient, “When it comes to my health, nothing is too expensive!” Continue reading

9 October 2016

What a glorious week we’ve had – lovely, Autumnal weather, bright and clear with just a touch of crispness to wake up all the senses. Not surprisingly, Ms Playchute has spent the week tending her garden – chopping, pruning, digging. Very surprisingly, I also was involved in a few projects (under her careful supervision, of course). Continue reading

9 October 2016 – Amusements

A lawyer meets with the family of a recently deceased millionaire for the reading of the will.

“To my loving wife, Rose, who always stood by me, I leave the house and $2 million,” the attorney reads.

“To my darling daughter, Jessica, who looked after me in sickness and kept the business going, I leave the yacht, the business and $1 million.”

“And finally,” the lawyer concludes, “to my cousin Dan, who hated me, argued with me and thought I would never mention him in my will. Well, you were wrong. Hi Dan!” Continue reading

2 October 2016

Greg & Penny’s Chinese Adventure 2016 – Part III

And so, we come to our brief stop-over in Hong Kong on our way home. Our flight from Guilin to Hong Kong was at the very reasonable time of four in the afternoon so we had a leisurely start to our final day in Yangshuo. We gathered our possessions and packed our bags ready for the ride to the airport which was due to depart the Outside Inn at about 1.00 pm. Adam and Ava came out to the Inn along with Jessica and Ava’s mum and we were delighted to be able to spend a bit more time with each other before having to say good-bye. Continue reading

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