A variation on a popular theme.
Satan was complaining bitterly to God: “You made the world so that it was not fair.”
And God said, “Yes.”
“And you made it so that most people would have to struggle every day, fight against their innate wishes and desires, and deal with all sorts of losses, grief, disasters, and catastrophes.”
And God said, “Yes.”
“Yet people worship and adore you. People fight, get arrested, and cheat each other, and I get blamed, even when it is not my fault.”
And God said, “Uh huh. So?”
“Sure, I’m evil, but give me a break. Can’t you do something to make them stop blaming me?”
And so God created lawyers.
A man gets married and shortly afterwards his wife dies. A friend tries to console him and asks, “What happened to your wife?”
“She died of poison from eating mushrooms,” said the husband.
This man gets married a second time, and not long after the marriage, this second wife dies. The same friend tries to console the grieving husband and asks, “What happened to your second wife?”
“She died of poison from eating mushrooms,” was also the reply from the husband.
This man takes a third wife and, not very long after the marriage, the third wife dies.
The consoling friend asks, “What happened to your third wife? Was it mushroom poisoning?”
The grieving husband responds, “No, she died of a broken neck.”
“A broken neck!” replies the friend.
“Yes,” says the husband, “she wouldn’t eat her mushrooms.”
A husband and wife entered the dentist’s room. He said, “I want a tooth pulled. We are in a hurry – so no Novocain or gas. Just pull the tooth out.”
“You are a brave man,” said the dentist. “Now show me the tooth”
“Open your mouth,” said the man to his wife “and show the dentist which tooth it is, dear.”