A little boy was waiting for his mother. As he waited, he was approached by a man who asked, “Son, can you tell me where the Post Office is?”
The little boy replied, “Sure! Just go straight down this street two blocks and turn to your right.”
The man thanked the boy kindly and said, “I’m the new pastor in town. I’d like you to come to church on Sunday. I’ll show you how to get to Heaven.”
The little boy replied with a laugh; “You’re kidding me, right? You don’t even know the way to the Post Office.”
What do you get when you cross an insomniac, an agnostic and a dyslexic? Somebody who’s up all night wondering if there’s a dog.
A weathered farmer and his wife were leaning against the edge of their pig-pen when the woman wistfully recalled that the next week would mark their Silver wedding anniversary. ‘Let’s kill a pig and have a big BBQ party, Homer,’ she suggested.’
The farmer scratched his grizzled head. ‘Gee, Ethel,’ he finally answered, ‘I don’t see why the pig should suffer for something that happened 25 years ago.'”