Good morning and a Happy New Year to you all. We had an absolutely marvellous Christmas and are looking forward to a splendidly splendid 2017. I fear, though, that we may be disappointed – Trump will soon be in the White House for the next four (or eight) years and the UK will be blighted for generations to come following the Brexit idiocy – hmmm, not much to look forward to! Continue reading “1 January 2017”
Author: Greg
1 January 2017 – Amusements
My wife has this red ‘Christmas’ lingerie with faux fur around the neck and cuffs and it comes with a little Santa hat.
“I hate this outfit,” I said when she walked into the room.
She replied, “Then why are you wearing it?” Continue reading “1 January 2017 – Amusements”
25 December 2016
What a great week we’ve had. Well, I’ve a great week anyway! Our annual pre-Christmas outing up to town, a myriad of pre-Christmas drinks and other social occasions in the village, a birthday meal out with some very lovely people and now, here we are – Christmas! What could be better?
Continue reading “25 December 2016”25 December 2016 – Amusements
I got my first full-time job, but I could have sworn I was making more money in college while working for my parents as their daughter. Continue reading “25 December 2016 – Amusements”
18 December 2016
Good morning to you all. I hope it’s lovely, clear and sunny wherever you are and that your name has somehow found its way on to Santa’s Nice list.
I’ve just finished reading “The Last Days of Night” which I enjoyed. I’m not sure it quite deserves the 5* rating it currently has on Amazon, but it was a fun read. I picked it up largely because it sounded like the sort of book I would have enjoyed sharing with my father – a mixture of interesting history dressed up in fanciful fiction.
Continue reading “18 December 2016”18 December 2016 – Amusements
When I stepped on the scale at my doctor’s office, I was surprised to see that I weighed 144 pounds.
“Why don’t you just take off that last four?” I joked to the nurse’s aide as she made a notation on my chart.
A few moments later, my doctor came in and flipped through the chart.
“I see you’ve lost weight,” he said. “You’re down to… 14 pounds???”
Continue reading “18 December 2016 – Amusements”
11 December 2016
It’s been a pretty decent week, all told. The weather’s been half decent, we had an outing to Bubble’s Nativity production and we capped the week with a Bubbleicious Sleepover – who could ask for anything better than that? Continue reading “11 December 2016”
11 December 2016 – Amusements
I know we’ve had this before but I still like it:
A Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper of 20 years, Guido, has cheated him out of $10 million. Guido is deaf which is why he got the job in the first place. The Godfather assumed that since Guido could not hear anything, he could never testify in court.
When the Godfather goes to confront Guido about his missing $10 million, he takes along his personal lawyer because he knows sign language. The Godfather tells the lawyer, “Ask him where the money is!”
The lawyer, using sign language, asks Guido, “Where’s the money?”
Guido signs back, “I don’t know what you are talking about.”
The lawyer tells the Godfather, “He says he doesn’t know what you are talking about.”
The Godfather pulls out a pistol, puts it to Guido’s head and says, “Ask him again or I’ll kill him!”
The lawyer signs to Guido, “He’ll kill you if you don’t tell him.”
Guido trembles and signs back, “OK! You win! The money is in a brown briefcase, buried behind the shed at my cousin Bruno’s house.”
The Godfather asks the lawyer, “What did he say?”
The lawyer replies, “He says you don’t have the balls to pull the trigger.” Continue reading “11 December 2016 – Amusements”
4 December 2016
We’re back, after a very enjoyable ten day visit to the States. We visited my mother and brothers in New England for the Thanksgiving holiday and, true to form, I managed to secure two turkey dinners with all the trimmings.
Continue reading “4 December 2016”4 December 2016 – Amusements
As it’s topical . . .
Here’s a killer turkey recipe, with a foolproof self-timer. It’s impossible to mess this up. You’ll get a perfectly cooked turkey every time.
Preheat the oven to 325. Prepare the turkey, basting it with salt, garlic, butter, and black pepper. In a bowl, combine equal parts stuffing mix and popcorn. (Yes, popcorn.)
Fill the turkey’s cavity with the mixture. Lay the turkey in a greased roasting pan.
Insert the turkey into the oven, with the neck pointing inward. This is very important.
Do not concern yourself with roasting time. When the turkey’s rear end blows the oven door open, it’s done. Continue reading “4 December 2016 – Amusements”