Those of you of a sensitive disposition might wish to avert your eyes now. This post will, unfortunately, include several references to the “C” word. And, I am not talking about our incompetently inept government, although the “C” word would certainly apply to most members of the cabinet and especially to the prime minister. No. This is the week that Covid arrived in our household!
Continue reading “13 March 2022”13 March 2022 – Amusements
A Moscow man turns up at a newsstand and buys a newspaper. He glances at the front page and throws it away.
The next day he turns up and buys another newspaper. He glances at the front page and throws it away. The next day, same thing. And again, day after day.
Finally, the newspaper seller asks, “Why do you buy a newspaper every day, glance at the front page and then throw it away?”
“Oh, I’m looking for an obituary.”
“But the obituaries aren’t even on the front page!” the newspaper seller says.
“Oh, the one I’m looking for will be.”
Continue reading “13 March 2022 – Amusements”6 March 2022
It’s been a great week! Apart from the weather. We’ve had visitors visit, ventured out on a couple of outings and consumed copious quantities of food. What could be better than that? Perhaps the weather could have been better.
Continue reading “6 March 2022”6 March 2022 – Amusements
A man went to the movies and was surprised to find a woman with a large collie sitting in front of him. Even more amazing was the fact that the dog always laughed in the right places through the comedy.
“Excuse me,” the man said to the woman, “but I think it’s astounding that your dog enjoys the movie so much.”
“I’m surprised myself,” she replied. “He hated the book.”
Continue reading “6 March 2022 – Amusements”27 February 2022
It’s been a wild, windy, wet and wonderful week. Five storms worthy of being allocated names in about ten days – it doesn’t get much better than that. Unless, of course, one considers the “wonderful” bit – the arrival at the end of last week of Julieta.
Continue reading “27 February 2022”27 February 2022 – Amusements
We’ve had this before but what the heck . . .
A young couple honeymooning in Las Vegas were down to their last two dollars. The groom told the bride that he had a feeling that he could turn the two bucks into a fortune if he went down to the casino alone.
Once in the casino, he put one dollar each into two slot machines and won Jackpots on both totalling $10,000. He then played blackjack for an hour until he had $50,000 in chips. Next, he played poker and upped his winnings to $100,000.
He was about to cash in his chips when he got a hunch that his luck hadn’t run out. So, he took all his money and placed it on Black at the roulette table, hoping to double his money. But the ball came up Red. He returned to his hotel room.
“How did you do?” asked the bride.
The groom shrugged and said, “I lost two dollars.”
Continue reading “27 February 2022 – Amusements”20 February 2022
Wow – that was a “wild and stormy night.” We’ve been battered by storms over the past few days – storm Eunice arrived seemingly about thirty seconds after storm Dudley departed. At this rate they are going to run out of names soon. Lashings and lashings of rain, gale force winds – the Met Office issued a rare Red Warning – danger of loss of life from flying debris, apparently.
Continue reading “20 February 2022”20 February 2022 – Amusements
The banana loaf I was making was in the oven when my 16-year-old came into the kitchen where the family had gathered.
“That bread smells about done don’t you think, Mom?” he asked.
I told him I had set the timer and it still had five minutes.
A little later he repeated his suggestion. “Mom, I really think that loaf is done. Maybe you should check it.”
Always quick to come to my defence, my 13-year-old son said, “Eddie, Mom’s been burning that banana bread for 20 years now. I think she knows when to take it out.”
Continue reading “20 February 2022 – Amusements”13 February 2022
Another week! Every week that passes we march steadily towards Spring and warmer weather. Excellent! It’s been a good week – we even had two outings!
Continue reading “13 February 2022”13 February 2022 – Amusements
This from my friend Julie:
Cop on horse says to little girl on bike, “Did Santa get you that?”
“Yes,” replies the little girl.
“Well tell him to put a reflector light on it next year!” and fines her £5.
The little girl looks up at the cop and says, “Nice horse you’ve got there, did Santa bring you that?”
The cop chuckles and replies, “He sure did!”
“Well,” says the little girl, “Next year tell Santa that the dick goes under the horse, not on top of it!”
Continue reading “13 February 2022 – Amusements”